The Po Po caught up with us.....👮👮‍♂️

I was always worried this was a derogatory phrase, but according to urban dictionary:

POPO

A Police officer. especially the ones that rides on bikes.

Origin: California late 80's

police officers that patrols certain beaches on bikes wore a vest that said PO in huge blockletters on each of their chest. which means Police Officer. they usually ride around in group of two's.

when you see them coming by. you see the word "PO" "PO" when they stand next to each other.

Regardless, life on the outside came to an abrupt end yesterday in the ER. We‘re back in the clink. We’ve been sent up the river. The big house came a’callin’. Thrown in the slammer. I can keep this up all day. ✍🏼

Our time at home wasn’t exactly as we’d pictured it. Most of our waking hours felt spent at the hospital - Friday alone was 9:15am-6:30pm. The other days were actually more like 4-5 hours, but we never really got settled in. Sleeping in our bed was great - don’t get me wrong. But even that - our previous schedule didn’t allow us to really relax. I got up the first night at 2am, for the day. 😳 We both got up at 4am the following, for the day.😳 We only had a 3am pill (all others were during manageable hours), but it made it hard to fall back asleep. I think we had this vision in our minds of soaking up sun on the back patio, some lounging upstairs in the family room, grilling for the Super Bowl, taking a walk in our hood. Not gonna happen, wouldn’t be prudent. ☝🏼

C said that going home felt a little like dangling the proverbial carrot. I think the jury is still out for him/us on whether it was good or a big let down. Either way, I’m sure his body somewhat benefited and the intention behind it was one of pure compassion and well being for his physical state. And for that we are very appreciative to have at least flown the cancer coup for a few days!

A bit of the 25lbs of fluid is starting to come off of his legs. It is in part from the steroids (post craniotomy), and unfortunately, also the damage of chemo. It is insanely frustrating for him. While at home he would do laps around the house, but then have to elevate his legs at all other times. There are things they can do to manage it, but it does sometimes feel like one thing begets another, begets another.....hopefully something will begettin’ it gone. 😉

Fortunately, we have landed back on the 11th floor with our awesome support system of nurses and PCT’s that know us well. As I’ve mentioned before, they’ve become friends (technically, I don’t think they are supposed to do that). They always have our backs and I think if we had been banished to another floor, there might have been a mutiny. At least by one friend/nurse - who shall remain anonymous 🤫. Guessing a single mutineer wouldn’t have quite the same impact....?

Seems we will probably start chemo in the next several days. Hopefully we will have more clarity tomorrow or Tuesday. This will likely be a 6-8 week stay. Approximately 40-60 days of “walking the wheel” a la Midnight Express, sharing a single (1) bathroom with all other family members on the unit (yes, you read that correctly), leaving all dignity behind and roaming the halls in PJ’s at all hours (C never cared & I caved a long time ago), I’m even considering using my face masks 🧟‍♀️ outside of our room, daily extra scrubbing of both of our beds with bleach wipes (bc they are plastic/pleather!!!! 😳), logging C’s fluid output (I fancy myself a nurse intern - oddly enough, no one is asking me to join the program 🧐), waking up at 4am to check online labs (much to everyone‘s displeasure 😬), waiting for C to wake up and say, “wanna come get in bed with me”, or open one eye and then pretend he’s still asleep to avoid this 😂, having some surprising conversations at the wee hours of the morning with amazing people we otherwise might not have known, sharing stories with other patients or family members relieved that our situation isn’t the worst, sad that theirs is, and holding our breath a little bit each day hoping and praying that this time does it, letting go of what our old life was and accepting its new landscape, and just wanting assurance that we will have a long and happy life together. ❤️ I asked C the other day if we packed up, sold our house, and drove away to a little town if he thought we could outrun the cancer....he said it didn’t work that way. Cancer isn’t fooled by geography. And come on, how long would I possibly last in a small town. 🤣🤷🏻‍♂️

Happy Super Bowl Sunday!

Hope this finds you all well,

C & A

Sadly, this is about all I have to show our days at home. Gumpin’.