Craig’s thoughts

Hi all. There are no words that can possibly capture what I am feeling in these moments since 5:36pm on Saturday when C took his last breath in my arms. What his mother is feeling losing her second cherished child within a 3 year period. What my mom and Morgan are feeling watching him leave this world knowing that will be the last time they sit in a room together. The pain is profound. I‘m waiting for the balance of heartache and gratitude to equalize the grief. I am going to sit with my feelings and choose my words carefully for another time when we come together to celebrate him down the road.

In the meantime, I know he was planning on writing a final blog entry. And what I wouldn’t give to have this be in his own words, coming from his own self expression. I’d rather read it that way, as I’m sure you would. But that gift didn’t come. So I am going to take a stab at what I’ve heard him say over the years and translate that into what I’d think he would have said in his entry.

To the CEO’s he partnered with.....I think first off he’d tell you he respects you. He’d say he’s proud of the work you did together, but he ultimately valued the friendship more. I think he’d say the ones who come from a financial background are less of a thorn in his side.😬 I think he’d tell you to curtail your spending. 💸 I think he’d remind you that you DID in fact sign off on that forecast that you’re now questioning. 😜 I think he’d send you in for memory testing as it seems to be selective. And I think he’d tell you it’s been a heck of a ride and a great honor to partner with you. I think he’s going to miss seeing deals come to fruition. The challenge is what he loved.

To the past and present PE group(s). I think he’d say this latest one grew special to him. It was a slow start, but he ultimately forged some genuine bonds. I think he looked forward to Friday’s in the office and the musical chairs of where he’d office squat.😂 I think he’d say you better pony up because an offer at that multiple is never going to win you the deal. 😉 I think he’d tell you that they can’t grow a company and increase EBITDA operating only with current cash flow. I think he’d diplomatically fight for what he thought was right for the company, but ultimately respect that the decision is yours for him to implement. I think he‘d say, “it’s been a pleasure, good sir” to each and every one of you.

To those he had the pleasure of working with and mentoring. I think he’d tell you that he had no idea the impact that he had made. That he was blown away this week by your generosity of praise. I think he’d remind you to CYA. I think he’d tell you everyone should have a bank deal under their belt. I think he’d tell you to cushion the budget and then it’ll just be upside. I think he’d tell you one of his truest life’s pleasures was to see someone grow and become elevated in their position. I think he’d suggest that hiring women is one of the smartest things you can do. I think he’d say they are less about drama and competition, and more about learning and growing. I think he’d make sure to say the aforementioned doesn’t negate the amazing men he’s worked with too.

To his mother. I think he’d say, “what’s up, mama” when your phone rings. I think he’d say you’re going to be alright. I think he’d say you’ve endured more than any mother should. I think he’d say, “at least try to balance your checking account”. 😳 I think he’d say that Ashley has your back and you’re not alone - he made sure of that even in his final days. ❤️

To his friends and family. I think he’d say he had the time of his life with you. He‘d say what made him sad seeing you over the last several months wasn’t about jealousy for the life you still have, but the one you’d still have that he didn’t get the pleasure of participating in. He’d tell you that he should have texted or called more. He’d even say it with sincerity, but he’d ultimately do it the same way all over again. True friendships simply stand the test of time. He’d tell you to not sweat the small stuff. It isn’t worth it. He’d tell you to spend your life with someone that elevates you on every level. He’d say all of you have impacted his life in more ways than you will ever know. He would ask that you not forget about him, that you always raise a glass to him, and frankly his favorite, that you roll him up and smoke him.

To his wife. I think when I tell him I need him, he’d tell me again that he will always be right here with me. I think when I say can’t do this without him, he’d tell me I’m stronger than I think I am. I think he’d tell me I’m going to do great things bc he’s biased and thinks I haven’t reached my potential. I think he’d tell me to finish what I start 🙄. I think he‘d give me a good long look with a wink and remind me “nothing left unsaid”. And I think he’d grab a hold of my heart and say one last time, “you and me, always”.❤️

Hope this finds you all well,

C via A